Alexander~ Who are you

[Benson!]

(NOTE: again, not to sound misogynistic, but these are the natural evolutionary tendencies of people that can’t be avoided. In this day and age, and with modern people’s cognitive capacities, these natural tendencies can be consciously overcome. But in social, emotional and often drunk situations, people behave in accordance with their natural emotional selves.)
If you know who you are more than the women knows who she is, you will have a stronger reality than her, will be of higher value, and as a result, she will react to you and be aroused by the emotional spikes.
Attraction equals higher value plus the inspiration of a full range of emotions.

The below graphic shows the strength of your reality. You will not have a strong reality, albeit fragile, if it is continually and consistently defined by others (for example the reality of a hot girl). If you don’t know who you are, and struggle to figure out if you trust yourself more than you trust others, you will have a very weak reality and continually react to others.
If you totally understand ‘what you are,’ and you act in congruence with it, then your sense of self cannot be taken away from you. People will always react to you, and you will be fully in alignment with yourself as a man.
You will be very attractive.

Nurture
The term nurture refers to your physical body’s experience in the world. Your nature is your physical self. Who you are a combination of what you are (Nature) and what you do (Nurture).
A lot of people erroneously think that the things they do in the world constitutes who or what they are. When they make this association and harbour this mindset, they suppress their nature, and their natural self esteem. Naturally, you are simply a man in all of your glory, and to think of yourself other than that is to diminish your natural masculine sense of self.

But, if you make the realisation that the things that you do are just expressions of your natural male self, then you never diminish your natural sense of self, your masculinity, your self esteem or state.
If you see yourself in terms of what you are, combined with what you do, then everything you do comes from a place of congruence with your natural self.
You could be a basketball player, a pick up artist, a doctor or a hippy, but you still retain your natural self, which is naturally attractive. All the things you do are a function of you being a man, and nothing more than a celebration and implementation of what you are.
As a man it is your actions that make you attractive, not your ego. When you identify with what you are, naturally as a man, everything you do is coming from the right place of congruence and masculine strength. You can literally do anything, or be anything, and still be attractive, as long as you are tapping into your masculinity and coming from the right place.

This is where the catch phrase, ‘expression not impression’ comes from. (http://alexattitude.com/?p=22). Everything that you do is generated from a place of abundance and indifference, and is purely an expression of your true self. You are not seeking validation or acting through egoic defense.
You are unstifled, indifferent and higher value, and people react to you more than you react to them.
When you walk through the world as a man who is living in congruence with who you are, you soon realize that you aren’t your achievements, and do not identify with them.
This way, you can do a lot of different things, sample many different experiences and not worry about being tagged or boxed in as being a certain type of person.
Think of it like this:
TAKE CREDIT FOR THE THINGS YOU DO, BUT DON’T IDENTIFY WITH THEM.
Just because you fucked everything up, doesn’t make you a fuck up.
Even if you screwed all the girls from Victoria’s Secret, it doesn’t make you a player.
Take credit and responsibility, sure, but what you do isn’t what you are, it’s merely a function and expression of what you are.
When you are in congruence with what you are, naturally, the things that you do are merely A CELEBRATION OF YOURSELF (see Tim in Transformations).
You can also think of the different things you do as different ways of decorating yourself. (http://naturaltim.com/?p=16). Take,for example, the way you dress or wear your hair. It can take many different forms, but it’s just an expression or a decoration of your physical self.
People ask the RSD guys, “Why do you get dressed in the morning if you don’t give a fuck what anything thinks of you?”
The answer is simple.
Guys who know who they are don’t care how you are received, or about the impression they make on others; they are only interested in what they can control.
This is an expression of their natural self.
Following the model of ‘who you are’, being a combination of what you are and what you do with yourself, you can take on different personalities in different situations, dress differently, transform yourself over and over, but still be attractive. Because, in each situation, the variable of you as a man doesn’t alter. Everything, as different as it may be, will work because it comes from a place of natural male strength.
Tyler talks about dynamic nature of your existence in his blog. (http://realsocialdynamics.blogspot.com/2...tence.html). Who you are, over the course of your life, can take on many forms of expression, but as long as you are congruent with your nature, as a man, it’s all good. If you compromise your natural sense of self, you begin to get headaches, a weakened reality and begin to suck with girls.
Identity, personas, and the different roles you play all come from a place of strength when you know what you are. They are all accurate.
It only ceases to be true if you perceive what you do compensates for what you are.
There are a lot of different men out there, in the world, who are attractive. The commonalities between them are the fact that they are in congruence with what they are as men. But it is there differing experiences in life, which make them unique.

Everyone has a different story, a different sense of humour, different goals and they decorate themselves in different ways, and this is why women can be attracted to different types of men. The thing that makes them attractive is that they don’t identify with that they do. They identify with what they are, they know themselves more than the women knows herself, and as a result, she reacts to him and is aroused by the emotional spike ripples that come from him.
You’re the same as every other man, it is only how you apply yourself, and the way you behave that makes you attractive. To identify with what you have done is to form an ego, and to cease actively behaving in the ways that are congruent to you as a man. You become unattractive because you think you have the game won, purely on your past experiences.
As a man you will feel unfulfilled when you stop taking action, and the women around you will not be attracted to you, because you will seek validation of what you erroneously think you are. You will cease to continue to grow by discontinuing taking actions.
As a student of natural game, seek out the examples of the RSD coaches on DVD, or attend a bootcamp, to learn firsthand from guys who ‘get it.’
Two concepts that Nathan is well known for is ‘being the man you are supposed to be,’ and ‘being your own Guru.’ These are particularly valuable as Nathan is one of the most masculine and alpha guys on the team.

Learn from the coaches what it means to align yourself with your nature.
At some point, once you have come into congruence with what you, it will be time to take the learning ‘baton’ from your coach and ‘be your own Guru’. When you have learnt enough from your master, you then step up and trust yourself to do the right thing when decision contingencies present themselves. You can be your own guru when you are in alignment with the man you are supposed to be; it doesn’t matter what you do, it will work simply because it is coming from the right place.
Leonardo da Vinci said, “poor is the student who does not surpass his master”. What he meant by this is at some point, after you have learned all you can, you need to transcend those who have gone before you, and trust that you can be better because it is you who is doing it.
Profoundly, when my close colleague Ryan made the final transition from student of natural game, to master of natural game, he made a stunning summary that sums up what it means to be who you are.

Ryan said, “It’s not the right action because it’s the correct thing to do in the situation, it’s the correct thing to do because you are the one doing it. I know what to do because I am the game.”
When you know who you are, you will know what to do.
Conclusion
Who you are is a combination of ‘what you are’ and ‘what you do’.
I have figured out what you are, and what it means to be a man, by looking at examples of how men behave when they are not socially conditioned, and have tested this theory with hundreds of students, myself and profiling other instructors over the last two years.
I found that how you behave is what makes you attractive, and when you behave in congruence with your natural self, you behave in attractive ways.
I found that knowing who you are is an essential prerequisite before you can truly satisfy the attraction formula. If you don’t know who you are more than the girls you interact with, your reality will be weak and reactive.
Contrastingly, when you know who you are, you have a strong reality, you are higher value and people react to you.

I learned that you get NIMBUS when you are escalating, acting positively-dominant and are present in the moment..

I learned that who you are is not what you do, and that to identify with what you do, or what is projected onto you, is erroneous and gives you a weak reality.
I learned that when you discontinue to identify with what you do, when external factors don’t contribute to your sense of self, you MAN DOWN and identify with what you are naturally.
I LEARNED THAT WHAT YOU ARE, NATURALLY, CANNOT BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU!
I LEARNED THAT YOU ARE NOT YOUR ACTIONS. STATE IS A FUNCTION OF YOUR SENSE OF SELF. WHAT YOU ARE CANNOT BE CHANGED AND YOUR STATE CANNOT BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU!
WHEN YOUR SENSE OF SELF IS WHAT YOU ARE, AND YOU LIVE IN CONGRUENCE WITH WHAT THIS, YOU NEVER HAVE NEGATIVE STATE OR SUPRESSED SELF ESTEEM!
What you identify with what you are, you always feel good about being a man. When you feel good, the girls you interact with feel good!
When you understand who you are, you are always in state. The more you express yourself, the higher state you are in. More state you’re in, the more attractive you are.
Unbreakable state is the key to good natural game. It’s like you can’t not have ten out of ten game.
When you know who you are, you have core confidence because you define your reality.
When you know who you are, you are assertive, because you are congruent with yourself as a man and take responsibility for the situations you are in.
When you know who you are, you are unreactive, because you know who you are more than anyone else knows who they are.
When you know who you are, you offer value because everything you do is simply an expression of your core natural self. You have no ego and you take no value. Just by taking action you offer value to the world.
I learned that by nature, you can’t escape that you are a man, and to try and escape it is to pretend to be a chode. I learned that by nurture, everyone has their own story, and can take any range of interchangeable forms but still be attractive.
I realised that the advice ‘be yourself’ is all you will ever need to be attractive, as long as you know what it means to be yourself. I realised that the reason why love happens when you’re not looking for it is because, when you are being yourself, you are doing all the right things that make you attractive.
You are MANNED DOWN.
I learned that when freed of the burden of ego, EVERY MAN STARTS EQUAL. If you want to be a special snowflake, you have to take action. It’s when you take action that you are attractive. When you know who you are, you don’t take actions to impress others, because you realise it can’t be done. Rather, you take action as an expression of what you are, and to have an enriched experience of life.
Expressive actions are attractive actions.
So, ‘who are you?’
Who you are is a combination of ‘what you are’ and ‘what you do’.

You are a man, and from that physical platform, you realise the potential to achieve whatever you wish.
This is why you CAN’T NOT be attractive.
Alexander~