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[TobiasK]

BY Alexander~ | April 29th, 2009 at 2:43 PM
25 Points...Common Misconceptions of Game


1. Even though the word, “game”, phonetically sounds like gay-eme, there is nothing gay about it. If you got into the game as an excuse to hang out with men, then this is not the industry for you. Commit a crime and get yourself locked up, and feel free to allow others to help you explore that ‘deep avenue’. The gay-eme is about girls and being with them.

2. Acronyms used as false names are unnecessary, and tie into point number one, in that they are mostly gay and, hence, unacceptable. If you name is ‘Siphonator’ (send in prophet hence origins now activate turbulent orgasm rupturing) or any such nonsense, it is some kind of silliness that needs to be put out to pasture. If you have issues with using your real name in field, then you shouldn’t be in field. Put a metal plug in the back of your head and fight imaginary computer games.

3. Stacking should be used for pancakes, not for people, unless the people are two girls in which case that can be ok. If you need to stack that would be the equivalent of throwing bricks at someone who can’t catch. It’s certainly not fun for them, and it makes you look impractical, because its a lot of effort for nothing. People will question your integrity for taunting someone with no arms in the first place anyway. They will ask you, do you have no empathy?... to which you will reply ‘what is empathy?’.

4. Yes, drive-in movies are cool. A lot of people think that to take a girl on a date that doesn’t consist of taking her to the bedroom and the combo Jedi talk-hand flapping her into nudity is the only way to the vagina. Even though this mysterious method has been reported to work, it’s more fun to go and see a movie. They also have the luxury of popcorn and you can use the air conditioner in your car to control how warm or cold you feel. The girl will be kinda trapped and probably make a move on you out of boredom. If this happens turn up the sound in your car to drown out her requests of ‘hanky spanky’, and, then you can get back to the movie. If you are clever, you will get both simultaneously.

5. Talking to other guys about your sexual achievements isn’t a cool thing. If you’re a guy who cruises around and gives out business cards telling people that you are their next girlfriend, then you have some chilling the fuck out to do. If you’re a guy who gets plenty of girls in his life, you have more important things to talk about. For example, the Westin Hotel chain, credit card fraud, and live action role playing in the forest with plastic swords with acronym names.

6. Not having a moustache is a cool thing. If you are rocking a ‘white strip’ under your nose, get some real hormones in you. The moustache is the key to masculinity and the key to being good at winning ten step shoot out challenges in the wild west. A moustache will hide your smile, which will (as ties in with point one) render you emotional and gay. Also, if you have enough girth on your moustache, you will have the opportunity to lodge a cigarette in there for sweet tobacco purposes and simultaneously call dancing girls on your cell phone. All the while, your hands are free to spell out the word ‘player’ on a scrabble board against a feminist opponent. Though you will feel glory of this challenging, but important achievement, your ‘opponent’ wont realise your smiling and be even more mesmerized. Valiant.

7. Not all articles written in the community will be accurate to their title. There are a lot of ‘sexperts’ out there sharing secrets and what not about their field of expertise. Be careful; if they can write so much, so well, they must have some pretty good hands for typing - the sort of fingers that any girl would love to have as a boyfriend. But think twice, why would a guy with amazing typing fingers dedicate them to someone else when he can dedicate them to himself?! Ah ha! Exposed. Beware of what you read and trust your sources. Only trust those who test their things live on program in field. They are the shit. Otherwise you will make mistakes like reading twenty five point articles that only have seven points.

Alex~