Ozzie@RSD Samlade artiklar

[TobiasK]

BY Ozzie | April 3rd, 2009 at 1:11 PM
Imperfect Game
Most guys are looking for the perfect strategy or tactic that works 100 percent of the time. However, no such a thing exists, may be in their heads only.

It is not their fault. Devious internet marketing and the drive of our society to perfection makes the average guy believe there is a 100 percent bullet proof way of getting a girl. It becomes apparent night after night in the field that perfection is not a part of this game.

Imperfection and Acceptance

You must learn to live with imperfection. Things don’t go always the way they are supposed to. Actually looking into the times that you will get laid, you will notice that nothing goes according to plan most of the time.

Assuming

Most guys make the terrible mistake of assuming they will get bad reactions as they enter a group of girls. Don’t assume anything. If you assume, assume the best. Expect they will be in a good mood and they often will. Assume success and you will get success.

Mistakes and Sticking Points

Embrace your imperfections. Don’t hide them, don’t obsess over them, don’t get mad, and don’t try to make them go away. Typical mistake is to try and make imperfections disappear. Any attempt to focus on your shortcomings, will make them grow larger and stronger. Rather focus on your strengths.

It is funny that most guys know by heart their shortcomings but when asked what their strengths are they have no idea. They don’t even know what they are good at in the game.

Let’s say you are a positive dude. Well, that’s your strength. Focus on it, overplay it, blow it out of proportions, be the happiest guy in the club. You must approach sets and get them excited. Let them feel your positivity.

Live your life in the imperfect zone

The more imperfect you allow yourself to be, the more you will improve your game. Making mistakes is a sign of strength, never a weakness. Only guys that are pushing the boundaries of reality err.

If It Is Worth Doing

...it is worth doing it poorly but it is worth getting it done.

Most times I say to guys “don’t try to be perfect. Just get it done”. Which means don’t try to look good or smooth? Do you want to look good or do you want to get laid?

It is never going to be perfect but you will spend more time doing the right things. That’s the difference. You will do more right. You will be able to tell when you are doing the right things not based on the girl’s reactions but on how you feel inside. You will have an internal compass for doing the necessary things no matter if you are getting it wrong.

Doing something new feels extreme

If you never approached in clubs before or you are doing something new it can be scary. It is new behaviour. New territory. The unknown. Fear of the unknown.

You need to feel good when you are treading the unknown. Resistance to doing new things should be your compass. You are doing right. You are pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. Big lessons will be learned from doing this.

Lack of passion. Lack of energy. Lack of intensity


Excessive outcome orientation, dependence on results, etc., will destroy your energy inside. A tension to get results will substitute passion, playfulness and fun. You won’t be able to operate with such a sense of urgency. Most people will think you are weird and dismiss you on the basis that they don’t know what you are after.

Lack of energy happens because you waste all your mojo trying to hide. You make tremendous efforts to conceal your intentions by putting on a show to entertain people. I am referring to when guys try to make girls like them because they think this is what pickup is all about.

Making girls like you is not going to get you laid. What’s going to get you laid is not giving a damn whether they liked you or not. Truth is that on any given night there are a number of girls that are going to like you no matter what, regardless of the show you put on when you meet them. On the other hand there is going to be another group of girls that are not going to like you no matter what either. And there is nothing you can do about it. I don’t care how long you have been in the field or how much pickup literature you have devoured. When a girl doesn’t like you there is nothing much you can do about it, better move on...

Performance Anxiety. I Must Perform. I Have To Do It Right

What most guys call approach anxiety or AA I call it performance anxiety. It runs along the line of “I have to approach and pick up”, “I have to do it right”. All these “have to” sentences create an enormous amount of tension, tension which paralyses most guys. It is important to get rid of all those “have to”, “obligatory” type of sentences. They only work you up.

They should be substituted by affirmations like “it is ok to make mistakes”, “it is fun to approach”, etc...I usually repeat those as I approach a group of people. It puts me in the right frame of mind.