Tyler best forum posts @RSDnation

[Evilvalle]

Någon hade slängt ihop nåt dokument av vad han tyckte vad Tylers bästa forumposter på RSDnation, från 2006-2011, rätt bra stuff:

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You give value by your presence -- your unique identity, personality, and energy you offer to the group.

You take value when you want a specific response, and women can feel that from you -- therefore nullifying everything cool that you're doing because it appears reaction-seeking, needy, and fake.

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This stuff also always comes down to becoming too reactive/buttonpushing.
The more effort you put into "becoming good" the more you want it to WORK -- not because you're needy for the girl, but because you want to prove that the work you put into your new skillset is paying off.
This inevitably shoots you in the foot. It's a different breed of neediness. Like a thin shelack of reaction-seeking that you can't avoid, even if you "push her away" -- she just feels it off of you.

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You'll find that when you base your model of the game around being unreactive/masculine/confident that you can avoid the whole buying temperature issue, and have girls stuck on you like GLUE in spite of it.
This allows you the sustained increase, without actively doing anything to push it.

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There are lots of ways to make women attracted to you, but it has nothing to do with manipulation. It's purely biology/evolution/etc..

Actually, if you have the mindset that it's manipulation, then you'll feel like it's not really you, and you'll come across incongruent.

It could be said that I'm about as machavellian as they come in terms of picking up girls, and it's funny because the "holistic" approach (ie: BE the guy that offers value and is naturally attractive) is what I find the most potent and effective.

If other ways worked better, I'd use them. But they don't. I do what I do because I've tried everything and
what I do now works best.

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If your state, sense of identity, or general equilibrium is affected by the girl's response, you are taking value. She will feel this.

This is difficult because when you approach, you probably want a specific outcome. But really, you should be coming from the frame of a guy who already has a harem waiting at home -- oversexed and tapped out -- you're just offering value, and have no emotional reaction to her responses.

At the same time, you should also be conveying a ton of sexuality. She should know that you haven't the slightest hesitation to take what you want.

This is a fine balance, but when you strike it your results go through the roof.

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The theory about being unreactive as a subtle devalidation or neg is right, IMHO. Rather than being a "button pusher" (which makes you chase her for 30 seconds until you show interest, and then she goes cold again), you BECOME a higher value guy, so that you're naturally unreactive and she ALWAYS wants your validation.

This is why the button-pushing model is flawed. It's not that negs are bad -- a guy who doesn't need them but uses them for fun will do well with them. But if you have a chode who believes he doesn't have to improve HIMSELF, and he can just learn a sequence of buttons to push, he becomes distracted from his overall goal.

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Shift your sense of identity from social-feedback-addiction to a sense of having CORE VALUE -- something that is not dependent on people's reactions to you.

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RSD is about deep, identity level change.

I rarely "do" anything to get attraction -- but I get as much, if not more attraction than any "PUA" you'll ever see.

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The reasons your friends are good is because they're dominant and unreactive. It's not about living up to OTHER people's standards --> it's about ASSERTING your own standards so strongly that they scramble to live up to yours.

If you've ever been talking to a popular kid in high school, and found yourself talking about all sorts of topics that you're not interested in, and agreeing with things that you don't really agree with, then you know what I'm talking about.

When you're a good pickup artist, you can approach a girl and have her making up lies to be agreeable, similar to how a male AFC/chode/bitch will lie to agree with a hot girl.

Why not try an experiment? Go out and get yourself into state. Like, get yourself to that perfect sweet spot in your game where you can do no wrong. Once you've done that, try going up to a girl with something intellectual that YOU want to talk about. Be unreactive, lay down your standards, and use whatever kind of humour is true to who you are.

Post back the results, and we'll go through it.

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Women can quickly tell when you have internal boundaries in your own mind, how dominant you are, etc etc..

Imagine if instead of cultivating a set of tactics and techniques, you went out every night and worked on cultivating strength in YOUR OWN reality -- and you spent two years working on this.

Where would you be?

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The emotion of attraction is not a choice -- just like when you see a girl with a certain face, hip-to-waist ratio, etc, you have no choice about feeling attraction.

Sex is still a choice.

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Unreactive means not feeling an emotional reaction towards the woman's frame of --> I'm the shit, you want me, you're another guy trying to supplicate me, you're selling yourself to me, etc..

In any social interaction there is one person reacting more to the other person than that person is reacting to them. By not reacting, she starts to react to YOUR frame, and becomes attracted.

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Being a cool guy is what gets you attraction. What is being a cool guy? It's not complicated. Think back to high school, and the kids who were popular. Now don't glorify them -- most weren't getting laid all that much because they didn't know how to make it happen. But they WERE getting attraction from girls, which is the aspect that you can learn from.

So what do you study to become a cool guy? It's not complicated. All the stuff we talk about here -- having a strong reality, not caring what people think about you, having your own sense of humour, making people earn your validation, being able to vibe with people, etc etc..

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Whenever there are two guys, one of them has a stronger DRAW of SOCIAL-ENERGY in his direction. It's caused by being in state, assertiveness, positivity, playfulness, social savvy, frame control, dominance, etc etc..

Unless you're a GIRL who is worried about being PRETTY, looks has nothing to do with any of that...

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The guy with better "game" -- ie: more confidence, more "in state", will always get the hotter girl. Period.
Back when I was learning this stuff I was kind of a dickhead with a lot to prove. There were a lot of dickhead things I used to do that I wouldn't do now, one of which was to steal the girlfriends of high-profile guys.
In Hollywood I would often be in venues with A-Lister celebrities and remove their girls right off of them -- ie: with them standing RIGHT there. Some of them were chodes riding off of their fame, sure. But many of them were cool/funny/confident guys who'd be getting laid even without all of that stuff.
However, I STILL wound up taking their girls off of them -- not because I was WAY funnier or because I had WAY better game. I didn't. You guys have seen me in the DVDs. I'm a regular guy. But just because I had maybe 1% or 2% more confidence than they did.

Just from a 1% or 2% personality edge over them. Do you see how nuts that is?! It was PURELY game.
When I look out into the world -- I don't see things like looks or money. Like literally, I don't see them. In my brain what I'm seeing is "How in state is this guy? How assertive is he? How upbeat of a guy is he? How much value does he offer to the vibe? How much of a price tag does he put on himself? Does his energy project outwardly or is it stifled in at his core?" I see these things the same way that you guys see looks, because they are more accurate models of what is really attractive.

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Posivity implies emotional fitness, which is equally attractive to the girl as physical fitness.

When you have positivity down, it's like walking in there with a set of ripped abs or something.. Just ask Jeffy..

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A few semantics issues here is all...

Basically, the "offering value" frame emulates the way a guy who's oversexed with 10 girlfriends would come across.

The issue with going out specifically to build skill set is......:
PREVIOUSLY: Scarcity mindset, outcome-dependent, trying to get that special girl.
NOW: Abundance mentality, outcome-dependent, trying to validate your skillset as a pickup artist.
So the result = still no girls.

Although you replace a scarcity mentality with an abundance one, you're still constantly trying to VALIDATE your skillset as a pick up artist.
This conveys like this thin shelack of neediness to the girl --> hard to put your finger on, but OBVIOUSLY there, like a steaming turd..... Which is honestly IMO a major reason that most community PUAs wind up with NOTHING, while many of their friends who aren't really any cooler than them wind up with at least a decent GF.

When you have the "offering value" frame down truly tight (ie: like a Vincent Chase or a Tommy Lee type vibe), you wind up with more girls than you know what to do with. Obviously it has to be combined with getting out of the house, meeting lots of people, having lots of experiences, and moving forward with the vibes of situations so that you're getting laid.
Also, think of any bootcamp like the Oracle from the movie "The Matrix" -- everyone gets the advice that THEY need to hear, and everyone's advice is different. That's why we keep the student/instructor ratio so low.

Frames like "Go the fuck after what you want and CLOSE" have to be balanced with "Enjoy the vibe for what it is and don't be dependent on the outcome." Different guys need to come from different sides of the equation, and neither should get too far out of wack.
Hope that clears things up.

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Unreactive = being unreactive to people's FRAMES.. ie: "be in your own reality"

This frees you up to be more EXPRESSIVE as you have the liberty to do so without being rigid or confined.

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just going out and banging your head against the wall = no results

studying inner game while going out constantly to internalize what you studied = massive results

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Basically, a girl's reality is like:
-Guys want me
-Guys hit on me
-Guys put me on a pedastal
-I'm a princess
-etc etc

When you have the "offering value" and "unreactive" mentality, the girls get NO SENSE of you doing any of those things.

As a result, they try to re-establish their realty by throwing themselves at you to BAIT you to flirt back.

It's not necessarily because they really want you, but rather, because they're trying to re-establish their reality.

Just two nights ago the (IMO) cutest girl in the club says to me "Buy me a drink"... I say "Fuck no.. No fucking chance". She says "I'll make out with you..." I say "Fuck no"... She says "Is there a lizzard in your pants.. Let me touch it" (reaching to touch it, because I used Tim's lizzard opener) to which I respond "No chance.. Back the fuck up.."

As a result, she's saying things like "You're so hot blah blah blah" because she's trying to RE-ESTABLISH her reality that all guys hit on her.. She wants me to crack under the pressure and start hitting on her, maybe even buying her a drink, and re-establishing her reality that she's a princess.

Many guys will try to accomplish this effect by NEGs... However, the problem is that as soon as you validate her the effect wears off..

So I do it by my OVERALL FRAME, which NEVER wears off.. IE: Just offering value, being unreactive, etc etc..

That way, even if I escalate, she NEVER gets the feeling of being 100% validated... That's the key to most guys' problems is that they learn a good "game" but as soon as they show any interest (ie: makeout, going to bed, etc) the girl loses interest.. So I stopped doing a lot of my old "game" and just worked on the deeper level frames because I was frustrated with that and wanted to improve it.

The reason we teach so much about inner game and frames with RSD is because we're hardcore pickup junkies ourselves and aren't satisfied with a SURFACE LEVEL result that doesn't yield LAYS. So even if it APPEARS to be good game, unless it closes the deal we have no interest in using it or teaching it.
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That's why I was saying that it's an OVERALL FRAME rather than a TECHNIQUE.

If it's your overall frame that you're just offering value and you're approaching with a FULL CUP instead of an EMPTY CUP that you want to be filled, then even if you escalate, the girl still feel a vibe from you that she doesn't fully HAVE you.

Think Jim Morrison or Colin Ferrel or Vincent Chase --> even if they're making out with a girl, they're doing it IN THE MOMENT because they felt like it for a minute, but the girl still knows that at any second they could just wander off.

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Don't overanalyze it --> the reason hot girls like you is because you seem like a guy who has so much going on that you're indifferent, therefore they can enjoy hanging with you without the pressure of worrying that you have a crush on them.

The way forward is either to get the girl to your house and then escalate, or to get her out with you partying with friends, and then get her to your house and escalate.

That's about it. Have fun man.

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Real self-esteem comes from knowing WHO YOU ARE and WHAT YOU VALUE.

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Self-esteem = something you already have

You're born with it, like legs, arms, feet, etc...

If you're asking "How do I get self esteem?" you're asking HOW DO I LOGICALLY JUSTIFY SELF ESTEEM which is really EGO.

Self esteem is not logical. You just have it.

As a kid, it becomes wounded. You learn not to trust it anymore.

However as you grow up, you can "re-remember" or "re-connect" with it again.

It comes from the realization that the more PERSONAL the wound is, the more UNIVERSAL it probably is, and that you don't need to IDENTIFY with it anymore. Everyone has hands. Everyone has wounds. YOU are not your WOUNDS.

Also, more importantly, it comes from the realization that THE SELF IS ALWAYS COMING THROUGH.

Most people develop egos because they think that's what's NECESSARY to get a good reaction.

When you realize that you're likeable just for YOU (self esteem = part of you), and that when you're talking to a girl THAT IS COMING THROUGH..... and that even if it doesn't right away, you know IT WILL..... and that if she doesn't like you it might also be HER issue and not yours....... then you stop feeling a NEED to keep finding logical reasons to be confident.

So it's a point of re-finding yourself and coming into your own.

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Opening with "hey what's up" is so easy it's ridiculous.

However, with all the mental blocks in your mind, it may be hard to do something so simple.

Sometimes on workshop I'll say to a guy "OK, stop trying to have it work... Just go up and say "hey what's up" and let yourself get blown out... Go in with no follow up and simply allow yourself to be blown out"

100% of the time the sets will start opening, which freaks the student out of his mind. He can't figure out why suddenly the sets all open.

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Zero difference whatsoever... I could shave my head and leave a ponytail hanging off the side and it would make no difference.

This whole thing is all in your head. "The self is always coming through."

I realize the obvious response to this is "Tyler's gone too extreme saying that nothing matters" etc etc, but dude, I'm SO SERIOUS when I say it's all in your head and that it has no effect whatsoever -- I walk my own talk here.

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I always find it vexing when a guy who knows he's a novice with women won't do something so simple as to manage his appearance, and especially his grooming.

But that said, do you not think that Dennis Rodman could frame control you even while wearing a wedding dress (as he often does)?

Do you not think Conan O'Brien could frame control you while wearing a garbage bag?

So long as you control frames, it makes very little difference.

"The self is always coming through."

All that looks/money/height/etc do is allow you to make more mistakes and get away with it. If you're a cool guy though then it makes little difference.

One of the exercises for RSD instructors is to pull dressed worse than any of you would ever dream of.

Why not, as an experiment, go out dressed in some way that you feel is a hinderance, KNOWING you're dressed in a way that's a hinderance, and see what happens?

You might be surprised.

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Quick distinctions --

CHODE: "Where are you from? What do you do? What do you like about that?" --> trying to wedge their way into getting rapport.

PUA: "Here's what happened to me. Here are some cool tricks I like to do" --> conveying their own reality and personality, drawing the girls in

NATURAL: "Where are you from? What do you do? What do you like about that" --> screening, making the girl scramble to give the right answers and keep the conversation going.

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This clicked for me last week in the field, finally I had proof of the theories, if you understand this, and subcommunicate it...BANG
Everything blows open, and women WILL contribute to your set

If you ask questions with a strong "expectation" of an answer because you are a "high value person" and you are JUDGING her answer subtly to see if she is good enough for YOU then she will make a REAL effort to answer your question, to qualify herself.

The trick is Questions should be asked with the right sub-communication, Your way COOLER then her, I'm qualifiying HER

And once this frame is set your half way home
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are you saying that by clearing up all your inner-blocks and focusing on inner game and subcomunications you'll be able to use a regular guys game and own it ?

Tyler: Yup, definitely.

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One of my buddies who is wildly succesful with girls runs this game:

hey where u from
oh cool how do you like it there
so your studying
oh cool. im studying xyz
how do you find it here?
oh yea, no i agree..
what are you plans for tonight
who are you here with
compliment
kiss
fuck

its all subcommunication. people really need to believe it - why would we lie?

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The differentiator between the three guys (chode, natural, and PUA) is the INTENT that the guys have in the situation.

Mr. Chode's intent is to get the girl to like him

Mr. PUA's intent is to convey how cool he is

Mr. Natural's intent is to see if she's cool

For guys confused about the "ask questions vs. make statements" thing, neither one is inherently good or bad. It's the INTENT behind each one that decides how the girl responds.

INTENT is mostly conveyed nonverbally.

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Awesome.. That's called "THE SELF IS COMING THROUGH"

They know you're a cool guy with just a few sentences (if not right away) --> therefore you get the result.

You walk up, assume they can tell what kind of guy you are, and that it.

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IME, complements = positioning yourself as the judge.

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Also, many people HAVE NO PERSONALITY because they lack a sense of their own tastes and values, so have nothing to express. Fixing that means to stop looking to others to decide on how to think and act.

Anyway, work to become less stifled, and work to have more value to offer by perceiving the world through your own lens.

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Funny you mentioned "grounded in your own energy..." because I think that's like 90% of the damned game.

(Well maybe being a fucken gangster who makes shit happen and doesn't give a fuck.....WHILE being grounded in his own energy......wooo!)

[Evilvalle]

Cultivate the mindsets, beliefs, attitudes, vocal tonality, body language, confidence, positivity, humor, etc, of a naturally attractive guy.

Then approach with intent. Hold no outcome other than to be clear in your thoughts, words, and actions. Create momentum by taking action throughout the night. Lead at all times and physically escalate. Extract and isolate. Close.


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The frames we discuss here on RSDN implicitly include the material taught in BP, so the knowledge sort of seeps into you without needing to watch it. But if it was never created then all those frames wouldn't exist, and we'd be teaching a very cheesy and less effective version of pickup. Basically it gives the background for the truths that now everyone accepts and takes for granted.

(Also if you watch it the concepts will sink deeper and deeper in as time goes on. The social conditioning stuff, core VS situational confidence, strength of reality, self amusement VS reaction seeking, etc... This is the shit that allows you to pull super hot women while barely needing to "do" anything... Think back to the last dime peice you banged and how did you do it? It was because you "got" these ideas.)

It's funny cause sometimes I read bad reviews of it and I start to believe it's true. The reason being that I don't really care one way or the other -- I'm not that guy anymore, I'm some new dood. So my tendency is to go be like "Oh cool well whatever I've got so much new amazing shit in the pipeline...I did that five years ago so whatever."

But then I'll skim back over the program and remember, "Oh yeah that's the entire foundation for who I am as a person today... All the hot women I fucked... All the success the business had... All the cool shit I'm doing creatively... The fact that I'm on the path to do great things... It's because of these ideas"

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Hook = attract phase.

Any more conscious effort to "sell" the girl on you is IMO very excessive and winds up creating the opposite effect.

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As with the movie "Swingers" you'll probably find that you start getting success when you become so fulfilled in your own life/existence that you female companionship becomes of minimal importance -- as this is when you become a challenge, internally validated, more exciting to be with, etc etc.

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The time I spent streamlining all of the information into something tangible was insane. The main challenge was the fact that The Blueprint is basically like a PUZZLE -- I would CHALLENGE ANYBODY to take all the concepts I laid out and put them together in a way where each building block goes "click, click, click...."

That was really the hard part. Like you take a concept like "sub-communication" and it sounds simple, but there's like 10 PREVIOUS concepts you have to understand before you can really grasp it properly.

Every concept is layered upon the previous concept.

So I had to keep playing and tinkering with it like a fucking puzzle for four years in order to make everything go boom-boom-boom.

That's why people really like it -- because they're listening to it and the information is going "kaplunk.... kaplunk..... kaplunk....." into their reality for the entire four days.

Then you've got all the new focuses in it, which obviously help a lot as well, as this is the "New RSD" type stuff that I've been using get wicked results in bootcamps for the past few years.

IMO it's not just a "little bit better" than anything out there. It's maybe 5X-10X better than the next best thing. That's my opinion, and it's biased, but I also specialize in this sort of thing and you can be sure that I was "very aware" of everything else that was on the market and I made sure to surpass it by leaps and bounds for the good of RSD.

Now OTOH, a DVD program is still a DVD program dude. Ultimately The Blueprint Decoded has got a million dollars worth of knowledge and advice in it, but if you can't make the choice to go out and use it then it's really worth no more than the garbage bag you use to throw it out in the trash.

Lastly, I'd say a big thing here is that when there's so much information out there it's hard to know what you should really study. With The Blueprint it's like if you're into RSD then you KNOW that this is the DEAL.

So if you're somebody who puts a high value on your time, you can watch it over and over and know that there's not something better out there that you could be better investing your time into learning.

(This last one is the thing that I personally think about a lot whenever I'm studying any type of new information).

That's basically the best way I could put it to you, beyond the sales and marketing language of the main salescopy (which incidentally I think is pretty authentic -- but this is about as plain-english as I can put it to you).

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You're warm but still confused.

You do not have to be ON you just have to be CENTERED in yourself.

They are two very different things. One is a playful energy designed to draw women to you in a hectic club environment, the other is just being a man.

The fact that you're putting pressure on yourself to be ON could mean that you feel you're still coming from a position of having to compensate from lack.

So you once you get past that you'll find that the issue goes away, and also, to be in a solid LTR you have to be dating a girl who isn't at a non-evolved point in her life where she's so scattered that she's not yet able to recognize or feel deserving of a good thing.

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Anything that is "reaction-seeking" as opposed to "self-amusing" tends to come across as beta.


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No better or worse than anyone...":

Remember.....

EGO = confidence (or lack thereof) based on the DIFFERENCES (where you're better or worse) than people.

SELF ESTEEM = confidence (perpetual) based on your common humanity.

I might "logically understand" that I have better developed characteristics than some people, more poorly developed characteristics than others.......... but at the end of the day we're all cut from the same cloth and if I'm walking through the world with a perpetually in my head computing where I'm "better or worse" it's just pure ego.

There are practical reasons to internalize this belief as well. The main one as related to "game" is that it ensures you'll never, ever experience "state" or "deservedness" issues. By not indulging in the feeling that you are BETTER than people, it's natural that you also won't INDULGE in feeling worse.

Beyond that, when you learn to be "present" you'll find that you immediately draw most (not all, but most) people up to your level.

I can oftentimes bring people up to my level "in the game" within minutes. You guys know I rarely make boisterous claims on here these days, so when I say this it's also important to note that YOU GUYS can easily teach yourself to offer this value to people as well. Perhaps most people won't instantly MAINTAIN this level after I'm gone (which is why a program is about teaching you this), but the basic idea is that "presence is contageous" and that we all have that "best self" inside of us, some of us are just more experienced and allowing it to come to the surface than others.

So when you live in a reality where people are most-of-the-time their "best selves" when they're around you (because you draw them up to your level -- an ability you have BECAUSE you already believe them to be there and you project that reality onto them), suddenly the whole "I am not better or worse than anybody else" becomes very true.

And you know what?? The initial belief is one of the "portals to the now" as Eckhart Tolle would call it (and Jeffy and I would mock endlessly, because it sounds funny).

There are certain "keys" that allow you to become "present". Believing you are no better or worse than anybody is one of them.

"My game is a 10":

Here, with this statement, to me encapsulates the true value in a program like Transformations.

You would never hear me teaching what Tim taught there. Likewise, you would never hear me teaching the whole "Just clooooooooose!!" type angle that Ozzie teaches.

Every successful individual on this planet has their own perspective / worldview /role colored glasses that they use to keep themselves going.

My "angle" is the super-analytical (borderline nerd / mad scientist) dude analyzes the game TO DEATH. I'll write a post that's 20 - 50 pages long on a weekly basis.

Tim's "angle" on the other hand is that of a guy who walks through the world probably quite a bit more "naturally happy" than the vast majority of the planet, and he has certain SIMPLISTIC worldviews that he holds at all times which allow him to do so.

(And his average post is about 1-3 pages, and yet they get a more or less identical positive response from people because he says the same types of things that I would say but more succinctly and in a way that communicates from his own personality).

So when you see Tim saying "Your game is a 10 and THAT'S IT!!" what he's essentially teaching you is this: "If you want to have game like me, the way I think in my head is that I never, ever, ever, ever question that my game is a 10.... I never think about this, therefore I never doubt myself and I always step to the girl with pure expectation of a positive response." (and remember that just stepping with 100% anticipation of positive response is like 90% of the darned game).

Likewise, Ozzie says 'Fuck rapport just close" but I've seen Ozzie have great rapport with lots of women in my day.

Again, it comes down to his unique outlook -- where he isn't thinking "I need more rapport before I can close."

He just ASSUMES RAPPORT (which is a self-fulfilling prophecy to a certain extent) and he's ALWAYS thinks he's on the verge of closing -- so while he be building rapport with a girl, he pulls the trigger a lot faster than most people because he has FULL BELIEF in the close.

So essentially a program like Transformations is teaching you more than anything about the worldview/outlooks/realities of guys who are known to be successful. It teaches you about their "internal dialogue" and the way they process the world around them to get success.

Remember that a LOT of this game is "delusional confidence". I don't believe that looks matter AT ALL. I seriously don't. I may be objectively "right" or I may be wrong, but I'll tell you this, I'm going to kick your fucking ass in the field if you believe different than me.

So THAT is a guy like Tim takes on a simplistic belief like "My game is a 10." It's a reflection of a "personal standard" he's set for himself never to retreat back into his head and question himself.

Hope that answers your guys' questions.

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Attraction = resourcefulness/dominance a LOT more than being a "pretty boy".

Even during ovulation, I can assure you the more resourceful and dominant guy will be one most women choose.

Looks are a pretty meager form of value. I have super good looking guys on bootcamp who can't open or get attraction for shit on a monthly basis.

If you're feeling bad, it's because you're believe you're a pussy who can't man up and step to the plate. If so, that's fine, but at least don't use Geoffrey Miller's book as an excuse not to try. If you fail, it's your own fault. Point blank period.

Use this as motivation to get better and improve. We'll keep aware of your progress as you continue and offer whatever help/guidance we can. Welcome to RSD Nation.

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Great stuff and total props for trying it. Also, for not giving up at the first sign of adversity.

Going "natural" generally works best when you're "in the know" of specific principles.

Some of the ones we talk about here are...:
-State (aka -- the nimbus)
-How to "pump state" AKA pump your own state
-Being the party as opposed to worming into their party
-Offering value
-Self esteem based confidence as opposed to ego based confidence
-Asserting the dominant reality
-Being unreactive (this goes hand-in-hand with self esteem and dominant reality)
-Moving towards "situational confidence" more towards "core confidence"
-Vibing and flowing
-etc etc...

Oh yeah, a few more very important...:
-Self-amusement VS Reaction-seeking
-Assertive/comfortable/playful bodylanguage, eye contact, voice
-Bold, even "out of control" openers
-Leading from open to the close, keeping the burden of responsibility off of her shoulders

You've got to have a solid grasp of all that stuff as well.

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Yes. What you're referring to I call being "stifled" or "unstifled".

When you're totally at ease in the environment, you become unstifled and your voice resonates and projects hard. This causes instant attraction.

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Im not exactly sure how to say this without coming across bragging, but I get approached all the time.

And I'm probably LESS good looking than I was when I was a chode, at leaset in a classic sense.

It's a lot more to do with your general attitude. Also, I get approached a lot when girls are with their friends next to me and they vibe-out that I'm "one of those guys" based on the whole unreactive eye contact and various voice tonalities that they get from your direction.

OTOH maybe it's because I wear a tee-shirt that says "13 Inches" on it, I don't know.

--

The concept he's getting at is "Ego VS Self Esteem" 101.

Idea being....... when you get "state" from validation, it's an ego-pump that will have highs and lows throughout the night --> therefore oftentimes blocking you out from closing the deal when the girl sees the fluctuations.

When you have self esteem it's more of a "clean high" so to speak.

One exception is that I think even with self-esteem you must become UNSTIFLED.......... and this is something that can be done by being playful, ridiculous, etc etc..... That's because even with self-esteem there are psychological mechanisms that are in place to prevent you from getting too uppety in an environment where you might get your ass kicked....... Upping the ante can push you through this.

Also, a key to this TheNow --> once this becomes your new METHOD you may find that it stops working.

That's what happened to me. I hit a 1 month G.O.A.T. streak where I killed it like nothing else. I was unstoppable.

Then I started getting into a headspace of "God damn I so fucking tight..... I don't need to do SHIT anymore...... All these dudes who need to run game are so wack..... I just rock up with no outcome and the girls jock me!!"

Once that happened, my "game" went to utter shit for a few weeks. A massive plateau, or more like a slump.

To get out of it I started being more playful again and offering more value that way. Eventually I hit the medium point I'm at now.


--


TWhen you move beyond wanting validation from women, you'll find that your "game" increases very sharply. Tolle's stuff is centered around that.


--


Unreactiveness is more often a SYMPTOM than a CAUSE.

It's a symptom of having self-esteem, so the girl's behaviour cannot affect your state.

It's a symptom of offering value (rather than trying to take it), so it means nothing to you if people aren't reacting in the way that you want.

It's a symptom of having a firm sense of who you are, what you value, and what your personal boundaries are........... so you don't allow anything into your reality that you don't like.

etc etc....

OTOH you could come at it from the opposite angle and say that if you UNDERSTAND that being "unreactive" is effective, you'll start doing all the above things naturally because you know they'll "work". So it depends on how you look at it.


--


Overnight transformations happen all the time. Here's how....

You have guys who have core confidence, an internal locus of control, positivity, independent sense of reality, general social savvy, self esteem, etc... This stuff is not rocket science and LOTS of people have it.

However, just like MOST people, they still lack the skills/competence to approach strange girls (and people) they've never met. Or they lack the skill to take a girl they just met by the hand and lead her home and fuck her.

These guys can get this area of their lives fully handled in about three days. I see it all the time. Three days and their lifestyles go to full out playboy-mode. Out of my last 10 students, probably 3 or 4 were on that level.

OTOH you have guys such as myself who weren't raised to have core confidence, naturalness, charisma, or any of the above stuff I've mentioned.

They can ALSO learn to approach women and "generate attraction" for short bursts in about three days... but may take a few years to become truly 100% congruent to the point where they're always getting laid.

In the interim they can get make-outs and laid spuradically, and also it's the JOURNEY that's the real fun of this stuff -- whereas the eventual OUTCOME is just something that once you achieve it becomes yet another thing you can do regardless.

So yeah, "transformations" take a varying amount of time. Everyone is different. There's no point in dwelling on it regardless. However long it takes is however long it takes. If I'd been thinking about how long it was going to take, I'd have never gotten any success. It was because I enjoyed the process and focused on the spuradic small victories that I was motivated to keep moving forward.


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[Evilvalle]

Ultimately the reason that the Ego is ridiculous is that it is so SUBJECTIVE.

A poor African boy could be thrown into your situation and feel surging, insane levels of confidence. Meanwhile you can't do so because you feel that you should be in a better position in life.

The thing to remember is that there is a difference between MECHANICAL and SOCIAL confidence. Like, the old analogy "It would be very stupid to be CONFIDENT riding a motorcycle until you were COMPETENT at it first..." is IMO a misinterpretation of what social dynamics is all about.......... because even if you're socially "incompetent", as long as you have a high level of self-esteem you will find that you oftentimes get a great response from people regardless.

Think of any weirdo who was still high self esteem and you wound up liking anyway (or that other people really liked anyway). Ozzie, frankly, is pretty friggin' weird but everyone loves the guy because he's high self esteem. The dude walks up to girls saying "Do you like my ass? You wanna touch it right? Touch it... Touch it... Go tiger... Go tiger... Yeah I wanna grab your ass... Oh yeah I like that.."

It's totally ridiculous, but it WORKS because there's not a shred of reaction-seeking (aka self-seeking) in his interaction. He's just having fun, and the girls eat it up.

You've got to learn to stop being so hard on yourself, and realize that regardless of whether or not you're doing well in LIFE, there's absolutely no reason for you not to do well SOCIALLY.

As easy as it is to forget, as people we are ALL connected........ and rather than deriving confidence from the DIFFERENCES (ie: higher value) that you have with other people, start deriving it from the COMMONALITIES that you have (ie: the shared human experience).

Everyone, I don't care who you are.......... EVERYONE has their insecurities.

And most of us are too darned humiliated and caught up with ourselves to get out of our heads and really ENJOY LIFE.

So realize that while a lack of confidence in terms of say your career might be a good indicator that you need to step it up a notch...... as far as MEETING PEOPLE goes it's all subjective and really a non-factor.

Your life might be awesome or it might be in a rut, but there's absolutely nothing stopping you from going out and meeting people and experiencing self esteem and offering them that value of being around somebody who feels GOOD. The only thing between you and this happiness is a bad set of rules that you either got from society or from your own typically human self-limiting nature.

Move past all that and decide to 1) start taking action in your life to improve whatever areas you're lacking in, and 2) bring a high level of positivity and self esteem to the table with everyone you meet REGARDLESS of these subjective rules that you put on yourself.

Doing so, you'll find that your life is a lot happier and that you draw a lot more women into your life as well.


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You walk in, speak loudly and be the center of attention, joke around a lot, toss C&F comments at her, get the room noticing tension between the two of you, bait her to keep chasing you, tell her to give her number, call her later.


--


To me, the way I used to game (2002-2004) was that to get "into state" I would pump a girl for IOIs, which would put me into state and then I'd start doing the things that made it all happen.

These days I don't worry about that as I'm able to get myself into state without the gratuitous female-validation.

However, oftentimes you still need to pump buying temperature as a way of "greasing the wheels" in terms of ASD.

For example, a girl may want to go home with you but not have the courage to do it. By being as silly as possible you pump her state which shuts down her logic and frees her up to act in the way that she really wants to act... etc etc...

[ZeroGame]

Good shit, tyler for president

[TheD]

Mycket värde i det där! Har fått HELT annan förståelse för "game" och massa annat i livet på bara 1,5 månad sen jag började titta/lyssna/läsa Tylers grejer. Thanks for sharing!

[Anonymous]

Grymma posts, läste även din thread "In the mind of Evilvalle" har själv fått en helt ny syn. Tror många blir rädda när de läser sånt här med, då det vill känna att "Jag kommer bli bäst på game om jag lär mig mer knep hit och dit" Gillar detta game sättet skarpt, då jag märkt av själv i situationer när jag känt mig bestämt som en king och folk har sugits in i min verklighetsbild, trodde så starkt på mig själv hade väldigt succésfulla kvällar då, medans jag andra kvällar fokuserat på hur jag ska öppna och hur jag ska säga det, vilket nästan slutat med att jag gått hem och inte öppnade en enda person.

[Evilvalle]

Ye dude, det verbala är i stort sett irrelevant - nog för att det kan vara kul att ha lite cocky/funny lines eller push/pull osv, å vi har alla våra olika sätt att skämta etc, men det som skapar den där starka attraktionen är styrkan av ens verklighet och förmåga att suga in flickorna i den.